I'm of the "check the mundane first" camp, so regarding your issues with being touched by your partner, my advice would be to explore possible physical or psychological reasons for it. Anything involving convulsions should be brought forth to your doctor.

As for exploring more spiritual/energetic reasons, you may want to pick up a few books on energy work, especially those that go into depth on shielding and non-conscious energy exchange (what some call psychic vampirism).